A Brother's Love

Ahhh... brothers. You can count on them to be there when you need support. And you can count on them to make fun of you when your parents buy you a munch mitt.

Wyatt loves chewing on his hands. He doesn't seem to be seeking his thumb; he just loves having his hands in his mouth. His hands were starting to look a little raw, so we bought him a munch mitt thinking that would help out. Wyatt's not having it, and Owen thinks it's hilarious. A couple of gems from Owen when he was making fun of Wyatt:

"One mitt to rule them all!"

"I am inevitable!"

We do appreciate that Owen's ridicule is tied to literature, and Wyatt might appreciate that this ridicule (along with the clear lack of interest) resulted in the munch mitt being quietly put to the side.

The New Stepping Up

Is it tiring to be a parent during quarantine, you may ask.  Well, between two full time jobs, one full time student and one infant that needs full time daycare (all operating out of the same 1,000 or so square feet), it can be a little draining.

Luckily, the littlest one of us has mastered the power-nap. We get a good hour and a half in the morning from him reliably, but from there on out, it's short little bursts. Now, here's the beautiful part: he naps for much longer if he's in a lap.

So, during quarantine this is actually taking one for the team:

Carrie has a 3:00 conference call? Boom! Hero.

Ed's got a lesson plan to submit by by 11:00? On it!

These are strange times. You have to find what works. We're getting there.

Routine, Interupted

We had just started to get a routine underway. Wyatt was going to bed around 10:00 PM and woke up at 6:00 AM. Ed and I woke up with him. I would feed Wyatt while Ed made coffee.

The set-up of our home makes it so we all share a bathroom even though we do actually have two bathrooms. We're a close family like that (I guess).

Wyatt would hang out while we got ready. I think at one point all of us were hanging out in the bathroom, including the dog. Again, a close family.

We would take turns entertaining him until Robyn or Debby showed up around 7:30. They would take over with baby snuggles, and we would finish getting ready for the day.

But three weeks into it, the routine has changed. COVID-19 has disrupted life as we know it. Schools are closed, and there are mandates to work from home. A new routine will need to form. But before it does, I wanted to document what was started because it was nice. I liked it, and I look forward to when it will start again.

Three Months (And What A Three Months)

It's hard to believe we're three months into this endeavor already. Though time has been a little funny around here these days. 

It's a little surreal that Carrie and I were able to take maternity/paternity leave off with this guy and after a few weeks, here we are in the limbo that is a quarantine and back to it for another undetermined length of time. This time around I think time is going to get a little funny for everyone else, too.

We still love the blobfish comparison, even if it's a little tough to see the changes at only three months. We sure see it here.

Seeing Wyatt develop mentally and physically is still pretty amazing. The smiles and giggles are becoming consistent and genuine. 

This is the time that I really started to bond with Owen. Seeing his little mind develop into perceiving the world around him, especially in humorous ways, is moving him into the exploration of the human condition. 

I'm really looking forward to seeing the tables turn. We have been trying to get him laugh, but there will be a day when he tries to get us to laugh. We can't wait.

In addition to his mental development, this guy is chugging along in physical development. He's already getting his melon off the ground with surprising endurance. I predict rolling around will be right around the corner.

Aunt Georgia

My aunt Georgia came into town for a couple of weeks. Her trip corresponded with my mom starting to watch Wyatt during the week which meant that Georgia was able to help.

I have so many wonderful memories of time spent with my aunt Georgia. My brother and I would stay with her in Montana over summer breaks, and she would always spoil us rotten. Once Ed and Owen came into the picture, she started to spoil them too. Generous and thoughtful are two of her strongest character traits. 

Without fail, Georgia has sent the kids a card and small gift for every holiday. In between holidays, she writes letters to let them know she's thinking of them. The first card Wyatt received was from Georgia. 

I'm so happy she got to spend time with Wyatt and get to know is developing personality.  

International Women's Day

Breastfeeding is hard. You would think something that is so natural would be easy, but it's not. Moms-to-be are warned, but it's not until you have the tiny screaming human in your arms and you just can't get them to latch, does the reality of the difficulties hit you. 

Breastfeeding never quite worked with Owen. Looking back there were numerous factors that made it so it didn't happen: trauma from an emergency c-section, a hospital that didn't prioritize breastfeeding, and Owen's health problems to name a few. I remember feeling guilty and a little ashamed I couldn't make it work. But in hindsight, it really didn't matter that he was mainly formula fed. Owen is strong, healthy, and knows he is loved. 

Breastfeeding has worked out with Wyatt, kind of. He's a 100% breastmilk baby but not 100% breast fed. It was/is still difficult this time around, but I was more prepared and have more support.

I don't have it in me to exclusively breastfeed. I want Ed's help for the cluster feedings and late nights. I don't like to breastfeed around people or in public. I take the extra time to pump, and I breastfeed when it works for me and Wyatt. I have come to accept that's the kind of mom I am.

So in honor of International Women's Day, I am celebrating the fact that I have provided breastmilk to my little chunk of a child for 12 weeks. If I can keep going, great. If not, I'm proud of what I accomplished, and I know Wyatt will be healthy just like his brother.

Who Needs A Pacifier?

Out of the blue, about a week ago, Wyatt started lookin' around for his thumb. Mind you, he's not exactly coordinated, so searching for his thumb usually entails some combination of fist/fingers in his mouth.

Example:


This is just kind of wild because he's not really that nuts about his pacifier. Usually, if he's fussy it's because he could go for some milk (right now!). This makes it tough to dissuade because when you pull that little fist out and replace it with a pacifier, he just spits it out and gives you a "well, what in the hell did you do that for?" look.

Given that awkwardness, I guess we'll let it roll for a bit; see if he actually gets that thumb in there. I'm sure we can just tape mittens to his hands if things start getting out of control.

Fun fact: 90% of the time, he's sneaking in his left hand. Carrie and I are wondering if we have a southpaw on our hands.

And Then There Was Life

Ten weeks ago Wilhelme life got flipped-turned upside down.



Wyatt got here and life as we knew it stopped. It was wonderful (and insane), but it wasn't real life. It was a temporary adjustment period.

Two weeks ago life got a little more back to normal with Ed's return to work. That was indeed different, but Mom was still going strong in this alternate reality.

Dealing with Mom stuff:

  

And going on adventures with Wyatt:



Yesterday, however, the alternate reality we enjoyed for 10 weeks came to an official end. We are both back at work now and life is the general shape and size of what it will look like for the next couple of years.

We are extremely fortunate to have some amazing support from a couple of amazing people.

Robyn is going to be here with Wyatt two days a week:



Then Debby is going to be here the other two days a week:

Those of you proficient in math may notice that we only have 4 days of coverage for this little guy. That's where this permanent situation really shines. For the next year or two Carrie is going to drop back to 4 day work weeks and have every Friday off. 

So even though our new normal has officially taken effect, it's a pretty sweet normal.  We get to see our moms all the time and our moms get to be an integral part of Wyatt's early childhood. That's a helluva new normal even without the three day weekend every weekend kicker.

Hey Brother

I'm not sure it's possible this early in the developmental stage, but it sure does seem like Wyatt is smitten with his older brother.

Out of all of our faces, it's Owen's that Wyatt seems to like staring at the most. 

If you ask Owen, this makes sense because Owen is just "so dang good looking." It could be that, or it could be that Wyatt is realizing that this is the guy that will always have his back. 

Two Month Chunker

Our little wiggle worm turned two months old this week.

He's a healthy boy weighing in at 14 lbs and measuring 24 inches long. The nurse at the doctor's office kept referring to him as "chunker" thanks to his amazing rolls and cheeks.

All in all, he's an easy going little guy. He technically sleeps through the night, but he is making his own schedule. For him night is from 12:00 AM-7:00 AM with a milk snack around 4:00. We're hoping to push that bedtime a bit earlier but have a hard time complaining about a seven hour stretch of sleep.

Smiles are starting to become more common as is cooing.  He loves to chat it up while maintaining solid eye contact. Now that we're slowly leaving the "baby is just a blob" stage and entering the "baby is developing a personality" stage, Team Wilhelme is starting to feel solidified as a four-person team in that we couldn't imagine Wyatt not being part of it.

Centering Friends

Being pregnant comes with numerous doctor appointments. With Owen, those appointments started to get old as they increased in frequency. So this time around, we joined a Centering Group. Our Centering Group consisted of other parents-to-be due around when we were.

We would meet monthly as a group - then weekly in the third trimester - with a midwife and nurse for two hours on Tuesdays. The meeting consisted of a quick check-in with the midwife then as a group we would discuss a topic of pregnancy or parenthood and have the opportunity to bring up concerns or questions.

While at times it was a little tiring to essentially have a two hour doctor appointment versus a 15-minute appointment, I am so happy we joined and stuck with it. Through the process, we met some wonderful people. Our group had a whole mix of personalities, but they all blended well and the vibe was always positive/humorous/supportive.

Considering we started out as 20 strangers, the process did exactly what it was designed to do: create bonds with people who are going through the same thing you are. The most wonderful part is that I have kept in contact with the majority of the moms since giving birth. We have a text chain we started after the class ended that is about a mile long now and anyone can chime in at any time day or night with anything on their mind and will find a supportive voice immediately. It's pretty impressive.

We recently had a playdate where we brought (almost) all of the babies together. Seen above, left to right and in birth order, is Woody, Benji, Wyatt, Harrison, and Auri. Ed and I had an amazing group of friends in Arizona to have playdates with and rehash the joy and struggle of parenting. I'm so appreciative that we found a group here in Tacoma too.

Ikea Has It All

There are few establishments that a new parent can confidently visit knowing that if their child starts crying, nobody will care. Ikea is one of those places. Visit an Ikea during the day, and you will be surrounded by adults with small children. There's a good chance that none of them actually needed a Billy bookcase, but instead just needed to get out of the house.

Bleary eyed from a 4:00AM wake-up, we decided it wasn't a bad idea to get out of the house ourselves. Ed wanted to get some auto-on LED pucks for Wyatt's closet and I wanted some mirrors to place low in the nursery so Wyatt can look at himself (evidently babies like to see baby faces, even if it's their own in the mirror). We headed to Ikea. As with every Ikea trip, we bought a surprising amount of items but more importantly, we had a stress free adult outing.

The best part was when Wyatt started an inevitable meltdown and demanded milk, we had plenty of places to sit and feed him.  It went so well, it felt like it was by design. I think Ikea knows its weekday customer base: half in the sack zombies who, come to think of it, do need a Glådøm.

*Not pictured: Our brand new Glådøm.

Sad Belly

Since he's been born, Wyatt has been struggling with a gassy belly. We talked to the doctor about it, and the problem is within normal range. Poor little guy just has to tough it out while his body adjusts to the world. It can make breastfeeding a bit of a challenge since once his belly starts a gurglin' and his bum starts a tootin', latching becomes difficult.

We've gotten good at helping him work through the discomfort. Making sure to regularly burp, tummy rubs and bicycle crunches (picture above), and drops for gas are all in our arsenal. Parent patience is also needed with a screaming baby, but we try to keep in perspective that he has a sad belly, and we're here to help him work through it.

Six Weeks (And One Day)

Wyatt is coming right along these days. He's sleeping a little more through the night. He's becoming a little more readable. We're discovering patterns of what works and what would probably be barking up the wrong tree. He's still very much a newborn, but just as we're getting used to having him around, Wyatt seems to be getting used to his environment and having us as a family.

I'm reluctant to make comparisons through time (especially when it's over a decade), but I think this feels different because I'm not as nervous about whether or not we can pull this off.

It's a little early yet to proclaim Smile-A-Thon 2020, but we're definitely getting more of these gems:

I have to be honest, seeing a little personality is really gratifying. I'm not sure if this theme has shined through on the blog, but this is hard work. It's so fun to see the smiles shining through.

Night Walking

Parents do a lot of tricks to try and get their babies to sleep for the night. Rocking, singing, and even car rides for those feeling desperate. Our go-to method when times are tough is the baby carrier.

Something about being snuggled close to dad's chest while being walked around the house is very soothing for Wyatt. The layout of our house gives Ed a short loop to walk around.. and around.. and around. While I'm sure its monotonous at times, seeing those baby eyelids get heavy makes every step worth it.